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Is It Later Than You Think?

by kphirst

With Daylight Saving Time it can be an hour earlier or later than
you think - unless you live in Arizona or Hawaii, where they
don't fool with Mother Nature. Congress, of course, can't resist
fooling with her and has repeatedly changed the dates on which
Daylight Saving Time begins and ends. As a law-abiding citizen, I
sprang ahead an hour on my bedside clock. Who knew my new clock
did that automatically. As a result, I woke up two hours ahead -
and it's not good to fool with this mother's nature.

On the other hand - of the clock, waking up later than we think
gives most of us cold sweats - but it gives inventors
inspiration. An MIT student invented "Clicky". When you hit
Clicky's snooze button, it rolls off the nightstand and around
the room - beeping and flashing - until you catch it. For those
of us with higher standards, there's "Blowfly", which soars into
the air when the alarm goes off and beeps until you return it to
its base. Then there's the "Gun-Operated Alarm Clock". For
additional snooze time you shoot the clock - which is what we all
want to do when the alarm goes off.

We all want to live longer, but women have been living longer
than men since the 19th century. As of 2008, women's life
expectancy is 5.4 years longer than men's. The National Center
for Health Statistics, however, predicts that men and women will
have the same life expectancy in 50 years. This is good news. It
means women won't be alone as long, which means they won't get
sick as easily, which means they won't have to go into nursing
homes as soon. Frankly, I'm not sure if men will have longer life
expectancies in 50 years or if it will just seem that way to
them.

Men or women - we all live in fast-paced times; and when we look
in the mirror, it can look later than we think. That helps
explain why there were 12 million plastic surgeries in 2007.
Although women continue to have more procedures than men, men are
getting more and more in touch with their feminine side. Men's
cosmetic surgeries increased 13% in 2007. The new trend is
couples having surgery together - which I completely understand.
Just because a couple has decided to grow old together doesn't
mean they want to look it.

KNIGHT PIERCE HIRST takes humorous looks at life.
<a href="http://knightwatch.typepad.com">Take a minute to make
yourself smile</a> at 
http://knightwatch.typepad.com

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